Quote:
Originally Posted by jazzy123456
You know, your not messed up...you are a normal human being who struggles with relationships...i actually think I own up to the fact that I have a victim mentality myself...My T's never told me but, I believe I do. its hard to think that way or hear that from anyone. I hope your situation works out soon and you can make those unhealthy relationships healthier.  |
Hi Jazzy,
Yeah. . .what i really want is to keep the friendships and change the dynamics of them. But the people closest to me think that it would not work. . .either because they don't believe my old friends would be willing to change, or because they don't think i have the internal strength not to be pulled back into the unhealthy dynamic with them. I sway back and forth between agreeing that it wouldn't work, to thinking that i could make it work because i know how to set boundaries now and have better conflict resolution skills. Still. . .I've already promised my husband i would not contact one of the old friends. Contact with the other old friend is something i need to decide, but it's been discouraged by my t and my h. It would be so much easier to cut the ties if i didn't run into them periodically. But i can't change that.