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Missquestions · Nov 15, 2010, 12:09 PM

I am hoping his girlfriend, I know he cares about me a lot . But not being able to express myself is similar to being mute. I told him that I wasn't going to decorate the whole places but maybe to hang a few things here and there. But he still said no, he said his never decorated his place in the past and he doesn't plan on it now and doesn't want any decorations up and that it is his place. It started off when I told him I had some stockings and would like to hang them, he still said no to me. I love him but I don't want to give up what I believe in because he doesnt approve. Knowing that as long as we are going to live together I will not be able to put up xmas decorations does affect me. If we do have a future, how is that going to affect us? He asked if I will convert to his religion, I do not plan on doing I like who I am and what I believe in.

Quote:

Originally Posted by KathyM

((Missquestions))

So are you his girlfriend, or are you his PET - are you allowed on his furniture - or are you merely his "servant?"

Geesh, that comment alone would have set me off. I'm not religious and don't celebrate Christmas, but if my husband told me I was not ALLOWED to decorate the house for a holiday - I'd wait for him to walk out the door, then decorate it from floor to ceiling.

He would most likely do the same to me if I tried to dictate his life.

It sounds like a petty argument that would carry huge red flags for me. A few decorations around the house will not burn his skin or take away his Jewish identity, but it will provide you with some comfort. Why does he have a problem with you feeling comfortable?

I hope you'll be able to work this out with him without having to sacrifice your soul (giving up what you love) for him.

Over time, it could turn into resentment.