hi. new here. There's four of us. At least that's all we know about. It's great to have somewhere we can be understood. We've got a problem. our T wants us to integrate but the little one, Baby, is scared of disappearing. She doesn't want to go away. When she has the time, it feels most natural. The others are either angry or indifferent or stuck so that they can't do anything.
The only collective feeling we have is fear. And it's a fear of practically everything. Especially anything that even hints at a reminder of what happened to us.
We are having to face these two urological procedures in the near future. We are terrified. the urologist met Baby and was really good with her, but we're still scared. the host, me, toesquasher, just talked to a nurse who explained the procedures to her very thoroughly. It was both good and bad. It was good to know exactly what was going to happen but it was bad because of how scary the procedures are. And, I guess, the urologist won't actually be doing the procedures. Just his nurses. Yikes! I know Baby will get triggered by the procedures. She gets triggered very often and very easily. If she gets triggered during the procedures and gets time, she'll get retraumatized. She'll both go crazy with fear and then completely shut us down. My T and us are working on grounding techniques to prevent being triggered but Baby feels like that is basically denying her existence. I don't know what to do. I don't want Baby to get triggered, but I also don't want us to be emotionally shut down.
Has anyone experienced anything that might help us? We are new at the multiple thing so we've never gone through these procedures as a multiple. We really don't want to dissociate but we can't think of any other way to possibly get through the procedures. It's the only way we can think to survive this. Any ideas?
Toesquasher