I never know how much stock to put into emotions. Particularly since they have become kind of rare for me. Most often, I don't really feel anything. I feel a bit like an empty tin can. Hallow. Empty. Like if you dropped a penny down my throat and put your ear to my belly you would hear it PING when it hit the bottom.
So when I do feel, it's like "Whoa. What's this?" Good feelings especially. I feel best when I feel nothing and my mind is in a good place. Bad days are when I feel vaguely sad, upset and worried and my brain isn't working or working overtime.
Because of this, I don't know if my emotions are cues to anything, senseless cruelty on the part of my mind, or seriously stilted by depression.
I'm not seeing any rhyme or reason to any of it. Is this just another "Welcome to Depression!" thing or should I be trying to figure out my emotions on a deeper level?