Currently my greatest struggle is just coming to terms with who I am. For so long, everyone just accepted my disorder as "that is just him" and they loved me when I was up and seemed to wait patiently for me when I was down. Through this roller coaster life I learned how to excel in everything I did, and was able to fluidly assimilate into any situation. I had friends from every creed, and refused to be told that I could not do something. In fact, for almost every "you can't do that" statement I did it and did it well. Unfortunately in the process I often severed ties to friends creating a sheltered existence and an existence adorned with achievements from the dreams of others.

But yet I am still unhappy with things. I feel as though I do not truly fit in anywhere. I feel as though I do not know the person in the mirror. I feel like the perfect chameleon, and can become whoever you need me to be at whatever moment you need it. I feel as though I can accomplish anything, but have no idea what it is that I want to accomplish for myself. Purpose has become a profanity and identity an image of your immediate need.

How do I break this cycle? How do I discover what makes my soul leap? What is the sum of everything I have done? When will the smile in the mirror be for me and not you?