There *HAS* to be some way to get you into a rehab facility inexpensively. It's time to stop making excuses about why you can't or what might happen. You have to kick into gear and take some sort of control here , Bama. I'm sorry you haven't had much luck finding a rehab to get into thus far. But keep looking and searching.... call anyone and everyone you know that might be able to help you. Your life is at stake here... it's worth all the calling and searching you can muster. I'm thinking of you, and you're definitely in my prayers..