kitty, what a difficult situation. Wish there was some brilliant simple answer. My gut feeling is yes, give a call. He may well not go for it. You say you are not sure it would be fair to the little girl. One thing I do feel quite sure about is that it will be fair to the little girl. Why? Because, let's face it. If he says no, she will never be told about the offer. If he says yes, she knows you remembered the promise.

(Don't worry, it wasn't triggering, though my gut feeling is not completely random, but based on my childhood. BAD separation, from which my mother kept us completely separated from his side of the family. What did this accomplish? Complete control of information. Anything that would have presented my dad in a positive light would never in a million years have been mentioned to us. That's why I feel quite confident in that regard. In what way could your offer possibly be presented as a negative? Unless anyone can think of one, because I can't. You'd be taking the high road. You may not be able to control the outcome, but you can always know you tried the positive approach.)

Please do keep us posted, ok?