I know what you mean... When I'm in a low place I often think about what would happen if I just disappeared... Especially when I drive I can't help but wonder, "What would happen if I accelerated right into the tree right there?"

Of course I've never acted upon these impulses because they are more just wandering, depressed thoughts rather than impulses. It's a bad place to be though and I'm sorry that you're feeling so down.

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