This doesn't sound like a satisfying relationship to either of you. Just friends sounds like a good idea. He doesn't want too much involvement. His saying you are too needy is about him; he is saying he feels uncomfortable about other's needs.

It isn't about you because he doesn't get to decide what your needs are or how many you get to have. You get to decide that.

Do you have a therapist to help you with your feelings? And to help you look at why you value someone who doesn't value you? Why you feel a need to be okay with things he does that you don't like. Why it is okay for you to sit in misery waiting for him to call?