Echoes, Wepow, SAWE, Tree, MUE, Googley, Bloom3, Seventy Eight, Kacey2, Dinos,

THANK YOU ALL for your supportive comments, ideas, and feedback! Helps so much. I know not all like hugs, but for those that do (((BIG HUGS))).
It is still pretty confusing, and I did several responses here... I think i have kind of walled myself up from it atm because it was such a HUGE blow and I don't think i could continue with the gaping wound it opened. I've leadned dissociation for a reason, and now i get to employ it by choice. For now. I've stepped into simply observing role...
thanks all,
Kiya