Quote:
Originally Posted by bpd2
My T has banned ever touching. I think I shook his hand after we first met, when he did an eval. Once he became my individual therapist--prompted by my need to have an individual therapist because it is a DBT requirement, it came up quickly, because I had seen him hug another patient upon leaving, and I often see him shaker their hand, or put a hand on their shoulder in encouragement. So, his no-touching policy hurts. When I asked for a hug, long ago, he said, "You, more than anyone, should know where hugging leads." It's definitely because I have borderline personality disorder as well as being bipolar, but it felt to me like it immediatly sexualized touching! Maybe he's right, but it makes me really, really sad. Oh, and not long ago, I put out my hand to shake his, in thanks, and he looked at it for a moment, and I was so ashamed that I had asked. So, nope, no hugs, not ever, even after four years.
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Banned touching? Like what, all touch is sick or something? Weird. Even I, who have anxiety about touching my T, see a problem with this. That sounds rather black and white and I would think it has more to do with a problem your T has rather than a problem he has with you.
Do you think it is because of the Borderline Personality Disorder/ Bipolar thing that he won't hug you or touch you, or is it something in your personal history? I agree that I too, would feel as though he didn't trust me to control myself (unless of course, he has problems with controlling HIMSELF).
I mean come on! The handshake thing is what really doesn't make sense. Does he think everything is a slippery slope or something? Have you confronted him about the handshake yet and how it makes you feel? Because that MIGHT make me feel like I was bad or something if my T did that to me (even though I don't want hugs or physical contact between my T and I).
What is DBT?