I've worked it all out - it's my job that is killing me. It gives me no purpose or sense of achievement, yet takes a minimum of 9 hours/day, 5 days a week. I cannot just live for the weekends. I woke up Sunday morning in tears - I think I was tired emotionally and phyically - but most importantly the fact that my life seemed to go around in circles - that hurt the most. It was hard to get out of bed; my boyfriend was eventually taking strain, because I was depressing him.
I've applied for a few new jobs, and will see if something comes of it.
Right now, I unfortunately cannot just quit my job. It hurts to have this void that just cannot be satisfied