HI and welcome. I'm sorry your path so far has been a difficult and painful one. I understand you've tried a LOT of different meds, but is there something alse your shrink can still try? Small tweaks in med strengths can often have drastic effects. Please try and remain positive; by stumbling onto this site, you've really bumped into a bunch of very supportive people who have been there too.
I trust you feel comfortable enough to interact with us, and we can offer you support and advice