If we totally could keep them under control and/or not have such strong ones... well, we probably wouldn't have BP, right? It's part of the nature of it, and not our fault. Sure wish we could. It's something I'm struggling mightily with at this time too, then feeling guilty about it happening at the worst possible time and not being able to control it, and 'round and 'round it goes. You are such a supportive person and sooo many here can personally attest to this. You feel that you tend to give too much of yourself to others. It is perfectly OK to ease back in the realm of overextending yourself in the interest of taking care of yourself! Such as trying to not to put "should" and "must" in the automatic brain tapes (easier said than done, but still one of the most useful strategies I learned in therapy).
Thinking of you and sending good thoughts your way, sweetie!