sorry zoo - saw this post and my mind went ape crazy - didnt read the rest until just now - and it got worse - i am glad you got to talk it thru with t - i am so sorry that you have to have this exchange at this time when you have been having enough other problems....

not to change gears on you, but when i experience something really stressful like this - i sometimes wonder what lesson im supposed to take from it - assertiveness? patience? self care? sometimes when i change my thinking - to an opposite action - i get something special i would have missed.

sending warm thoughts and hugs