When T was talking about my past overlapping my today and how I am terrifield of loving anyone I felt frustrated inside. it felt like I will never get this thing.

When î got home yesterday I continued thinking about session and I suddenly felt myself in a prison cell, then I asked myself is the door open? And it was. All I need to do is walk out. i think when I'm with T on friday I will try to visualize that cell and see if I can use it to let myself out.

i think in my head I've been waiting for the sound of keys outside and for T to unlock it, but its open its me that needs to just step outside, how simple this sounds, but is it doable yet? i'll try, knowing T hasn't got to unlock it just me to stand up takes away a huge blockage.