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kalisha36 · Nov 23, 2010, 01:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jen29

I just feel that it's been a couple days over a month now and it seems like everday/night it gets worse. I don't know how much longer can take it. My head is so twisted and people are starting to make me believe i did something so terribly wrong. This happened in the psych ward and many don't understand why I didn't report it till I got home so that's another thing I did wrong.

I feel like all I do is wrong and deserve to be punished for everything....even the things that happened when was a kid and as adult.

Please don't let these people re-traumatize you too! Really...If you can't discuss this subject with them then learn that right away and learn a safety zone that you can trust people who will protect you and understand your situation...Okay?
What happened to you was absolutely WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Period!!!!! I am not sure if you mentioned you had a therapist or not, but some people start questioning things well couldn't this person see this coming this and that blah, blah, blah.....SCREW THEM..........
Sorry.....
If you have never been in that situation and I don't know your past history either which has allot to do with how you will react to present situations no matter what your age then to hell with uncaring questioning people...Those who truly KNOW you and your character will be behind you 100%...Sometimes in this situation is when you learn who your true friends are...Sorry to say that but it's really true...True friends WON'T second guess your character or WHO you truly are or what you SAY!!! They will back you even without DETAILS!!! PERIOD.....
I too feel that I should be punished daily, I do punish myself....that's not our punishment to carry and I in therapy am trying to learn that god am I trying to get my brain to catch up with that

Please know that NONE of this is YOUR fault............Friends are there thick and THIN they really are...I have had very, very few in my lifetime...I know of really ONE seriously that know's of the ICKIEST of my time of downtime and she supported me 100% and believed in me...That's a friend...The rest abandoned me and did the whole I am not sure that you couldn't of got away or maybe you asked for it, or maybe you drank to much blah, blah, blah....ETC.....The same old lines.....It's always some one else fault but the Predators right? WRONG....Your the victim okay....Your INNOCENT.....You DID NOTHING WRONG....No matter what...EVEN and I am SORRY if you had your B_DAY suit on.....THAT'S NOT and INVITATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sending you safest hugs if it's okay and understandably if you can't accept that's totally okay....Take care of you....

Kalisha