(((((((((((((((((jexa))))))))))))))))))))))))

I know that when I am pushing away feelings, I can get more and more and more wound up and confused and kind of not-in-this-world. Even if I am going through the motions of eating, exercising, etc...if I'm not slowing down and letting myself be WITH myself, I get into kind of a scary, crazy place. I was there earlier this week, and it WAS really scary. I felt like I was heading for some kind of breakdown.

All I know is my own experience, so it may not be helpful at all...but I know that I needed to let myself SLOW DOWN enough to be able to check in with myself and feel what I needed to feel. I was lucky that it all kind of came to a head on a T day, and I have the luxury of an established safe place with T. I know not having that right now must be making this extra hard

I have klonopin that I can take to bring myself back down a bit when I get really spiraled out like that. Do you have anything like that?

I'm sorry, jexa. It sounds hard, and scary. I so wish I could somehow reach right into the computer and help.