thanks 4 your reply. ive gotten up in the middle of the night also to jog one time it was cold & raining & the town cop stopped me to ask if i was ok i guess he thought i was running from someone. oohhh and injuries are the worst a couple of years ago i turned my foot so hard the top of my foot rolled on the pavement i actually limped around town every day & it actually healed with me doing that. then a month & a half ago i rolled the same foot jumping with the kids on those inflatable slides & i was forced to rest it & i could only walk not jog. it makes me wanna binge even more if i dont exercise cuz im depressed. the killer with my weight is i have gotten back in the habit of waking up at night & binging on sugar which makes me feel hung over the next morning. the thing is my workouts arent out of control--its my thinking if i dont do it for a day. my max is 3 days & if feel like im gonna go insane. my t encourages my workouts because it helps control anxiety & bp (he says its like a med for me) but i havent came out & told him about the other side of it your right exercise bulimia like rite now its 1am east time & i cant wait til morning when i can go work out & im already thinking make up laps. i feel like its the only thing i have that i can still control. rite now the walk/runs i do are equal to about 5 or 6 miles. i remember a time i would go 10 full miles (a full lap around my town is a mile) after a binge. i know its so counterproductive to be exercising to not even burn off half the crap i binge on but right now its more to feel good mentally & so i can function each day.