I'm on pills for anxiety, depression, and moods. But something still isn't right. I literally tried to make myself throw up this morning so that I wouldn't have to go to school. What sane person does that? I risked, and still run the risk, of my mom calling the psychiatric hospital again, and not letting me go on vacation because I'll be there. I'm just really scared. Of myself. I don't know what's wrong with me. My stomach doesn't feel right now, and I regret what I did. I wrecked the day for my family. I should have just went to school. But part of me is angry at no one, and isn't guilty at all. Part of me just wants to kill myself and get it over with. What's the point? I don't know what's wrong with me.

It's like another person takes control, the person that's evil, that pretends to throw up to evade school, that searches her sister's room for the laptop so she can get online. I don't know what's wrong with me. And it scares me.