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Nov 26, 2010, 08:27 PM
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Member Since: Jun 2007
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 5,518
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Hi With or Without You
I think AAAAA gave you some sound advice.
I was in a similar situation as you, only I was the younger sister. My sister packed up and moved to Texas. She encouraged me to move there too, but I couldn't see leaving my elderly parents behind to fend for themselves.
I didn't live with my parents, but I lived close enough to care for them on a daily basis. Like your sister, I was the "black sheep" in my mother's eyes. It was difficult listening to mom speak so highly of my sister with a look of love on her face, then treat me like dirt. It was difficult spending day after day listening to mom bi*ch about every aspect of her life as I gave her medicine, treated her wounds, and cleaned her house. It was difficult when my sister would come to visit because all she had to do was visit. Mom always perked up when my sister came to town. After she left, all I heard was "why can't you be more like your sister?"
You could say my sister got the easy end of the deal because I had to do all the work, but she didn't. When my father was dying, my sister couldn't get a flight here in time to say goodbye to him. She planned to take mom back to Texas with her and she was looking forward to spending some real time with mom, but mom died 8 days after dad. My sister went home alone. It was very difficult for her to mourn for them because she knew she hadn't given them any of her blood, sweat, and tears to care for them.
Don't let this drive a wedge between you and your sister. She's the only sister you've got. You two may need each other one day. 
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