thanks for replying, jazzy. I know you're hurting now, too.
zoo, that's exactly it!
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I think this is one of the ways that the therapeutic relationship is unusual, because no other relationship has the goal of "breaking up" at the end, you know? It's kind of backwards or upside down.
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I'm just getting to the point of being able to ask T to hold my hand or to hug me, and I have to hear from her that the goal is for me to do that for myself and not need her. That hurts me as much as the hurts from my past! I KNOW she will say it's a goal, and she knows I'm not there yet, but it's my same pattern I've had in all my therapies. The T makes me feel good, and I don't want it to stop. How is this therapy going to be different? T says with IFS, my parts will tell their stories and that will help. I just don't know that will REALLY happen.
I hope you're feeling better, zoo.
geez, thank you for understanding!!