Thanks Ygrec. I just ... I don't know how to explain it. I also had a very strange dream about my best friend that really messed with my head and I am not even sure how to process that. It was just a dream but it messed with me. Then there is work stuff that keeps just getting deeper and deeper with junk. And they are getting ready to roll out even larger things that will really bring down even more pressure. And I honestly can't learn stuff right now. So I already feel like I am just barely hanging onto my job by a thread. But I don't have the energy to change jobs or go back to school. I started to have a little energy this past week but then seeing my brother zapped that.

I just keep feeling like the harder I try, the harder it is. I feel like I am in emotional quicksand on days like today.