Thank you Gus. i appreciate the encouragement.

Dark Dreams- I am so glad(humbled) to find someone out there in a similar situation. Makes me feel not so alone. You are nose on with the caring and not caring. I also am away, safely far away from him. I havn't seen or talked to him in over a year. I don't know what to do with all my rage towards him.

but you're right, you have to cut those ties that put you in danger. For years I thought it selfish to shun him because of my religion. Now i know it's healthy to put myself first. I don't plan a life with him in it ever. The only person I feel scared for is his new little wife from WAYY over seas. She has no idea, but there's nothing i can do, even i wanted.

its easy to cut ties. but the scarring of every evil act is much to bare. trying to move on, to Start Over. I wish i knew how to do this better....