Hello funkymonkey and welcome to the forum. I'm sorry for taking so long in replying. I've had to give some thought to your post and that is the reason for this delayed post.

I don't know anything of fibro and it wasn't until I read Deborah's reply that I learned something of it. Pain sure can make all the things we so easily take for granted harder, of that I am sure.

As for your husband, well I think you were pretty honest with him before your marriage so he shouldn't be suprised by your having pain. A question if you will ... Did he ask about fibro and how it effected you and did you explain it to him?

And of course, one could talk all day long probably and never really show the full effect of what something is until they actually see it for theirself, so maybe even if you two did discuss it in detail, it probably couldn't be fully understood until seeing it face to face.

There's not much in this world I hate, but sickness and pain is something I think is ok for everyone to hate. I'm sorry you are in such pain.

I know we each have experience pain in some fashion or another, but one thing holds true I think, and it is that while it may be easy for one to empathize with one in pain - we cannot fully understand the intensity of that pain - not even if we have that same pain for we each have stronger or weaker resistance to it. I admit, as a guy - I'm a wuss for sure because I can't stand pain of any sort. I have always been positive that women are the stronger sex (and am I ever so thankful men don't have to give childbirth!).

Is there anything available you could take that would not make you like a zombie? I mean, besides alcohol? I know it may work now but am sure it will for a limited time. But my experience with it is, it is a sneaky devil and one that can or is very capable of controling one even before they are aware of it.

For example, now it may be one or two drinks, but the more time passes, so does it's ability to dull the pain, or to have the same effect, and then it takes three or four drinks and so on and so on. I sure wouldn't want it to take hold on you.

I say that, and will admit that I drink one beer a week along with my pizza I have on Saturday night. Sometimes, I will drink two, but only if I am eating. Once or twice a year, I may even pour me a stiff drink of Jack Daniels, but it is random and I never get high and haven't been drunk in ages.

I for one don't view alcohol as being bad - something a Christian or religious person couldn't partake of. For the most part, it is no different than say coffee or soda, for if one were to drink too much of either it would be harmful. It isn't so much as what goes into a person I think as what comes out of the person that makes something good or bad.

The greatest thing against a Christian drinking alcohol in my opinion is two-fold: 1, it could make one look bad should anyone see them buy or drink it, and 2, it has the ability to take control of people if they aren't careful.

So I beseech you to maybe try another method to ease your pain and hope that your husband will be a husband and embrace you, honor you as a husbans should, and support you in your pain.

I surely do wish I could have done more - said something that would perhaps have been of greater assistance to you, but you do have my thoughts and hopes and best wishes. Please do post and reply as often as you can or feel like doing. We would like to know how you're doing and how you're coping.

Your friend Sam

"You'll never know what you're capable of if you don't try."