i do not know what's with this week... or i should say this month... what do you do when you don't love your job, and you are "expected" to love it, and be good at it? you can't leave the job because it's family owned, and you don't have other means of living except for that.. which i don't consider living at all, just some kind of allowance... i was asked, where was my head and where did my heart lie... and i wanted to say, AWAY FROM YOU... i know part of it is my fault for i am not being good at it and i do tend to forget stuff and i don't actually care.. and now, i am being "ganged up" by the "bosses" (which are my parents). Mom was threatening me if she should take away the job from me, and be 'jobless'.. haha.. i told my mom no, just to 'show' her that i actually care!!! i know, my life's pathetic... and am too chicken to do some actions... kinda hard being the only girl, and the youngest... dang it... i want an escape!!! i want to be gone away from them and never come back... i NEED courage, and i NEED to toughen up my heart... i NEED to be away!!! for me to grow!! waaaaahhhhhhhhh.... dang this life... *sorry*