Good morning KD! I started working with a very special Dr 17 years ago doing neural integration (controversial of course). One thing he said, re: the whole context of what we were doing, was, "You are going to see, understand, things other people take for granted". Made me feel special. Yeh, we got to go through each little piece, first find them, then turn them face up so we can see what they are, then try to figure out where they fit in the total puzzle that is us.

On my first appointment with him, he asked if I was afraid of anything. I chuckled, in my best: born in NY, I've seen it all, nothing phases ME! chuckle and said, "Huh?' He said, "You know, like heights?" I said, "Oh, well, yeh, I hate small sapces."

Before you could say "Boo", I realized I was afraid, ie triggered by EVERYTHING. Whhhoooeeee, taht ws a shocker to wrap my brain around. But it was true. Once I was able to identify being triggered (first I had to create a safe space to learn what it was to NOT be triggered.....) I was on the road to healing.

I had to decide I was my life's work. (And worth the effort.)

I had dissociated from all my senses. In order to respond to life, I routed everything through my brain. I was araid to just accept input from them because all of them had sent me such life threatening news since I was born.

I've literally had to remake myself. I am my own work of art.

Like other art projects, or any creative eneavor, time is irrelevant. Letting go of time in this culture is hard, but not impossible. Being fascinated by my being (and other beings, for we all are really one) makes it sorta thrillling. I think I get endorphins when I figure something out.

Nobody can take more than one step at a time, huh?