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Dec 01, 2010, 02:51 PM
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Close to the Adirondacks but not close enough
Posts: 578
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Yes, you do matter to her, Rainbow. And your child parts matter to her, and she knows they need to matter and they need to be heard. Like Peaches said, this T is different because she knows that all parts of you need to be valued and heard and not dismissed and ignored. Your old T was denying those parts the opportunity to heal by trying to force YOU to suppress them. It doesn't work. It just covers things up for awhile but inside you become a pressure cooker ready to explode.
My child parts feel valued and heard by my T even though they were disappointed to learn he could not meet their need for him to act as the good parent they desperately wanted. It takes lots of time but eventually you can work through the pain of unmet needs and the child parts will appreciate the limits of the therapy relationship because ultimately it will feel safe to know that your T is looking out for them by not creating an unhealthy dependency.
In the meantime, it does hurt a lot... but just keep talking about it as much as you need to. It WILL feel better. 
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