I'm going to get in touch with him in the next couple days, as having no insurance really hinders my ability to get help in a timely manner. I'm moving at the end of the month as well so a lot of my money is tied up in that as well as making sure I have money for the next month's bills because my work contract ends December 18th and I do't have a good line on a new position just yet.

Last night's sleep was of vivid dreams, bordering on nightmares. I had a bit of trouble waking from some of them because of how real they felt. People I knew being killed before my eyes was hard to deal with. I woke up early again, right around 7:30. I'm beginning to wonder if Wellbutrin ups the amount of seratonin in your body, helping move your sleep cycle to something a bit more "normal." I was quite exhausted last night by the time I could head home from work, my body shaking under the stress and tiredness. I wanted nothing more than to call Kelsey and apologize for how I had been acting, even though she knew I was so stressed out and such.

I'd like to find something to help me sleep, but I don't know if I could afford it. I'm looking into help for medication costs, as I wouldn't mind being put on something if it was going to help me and wasn't going to make as huge an impact as this months meds made on me.

I'll probably edit this a bit later to add more of what I'm feeling with today since I just took my meds (10am as I got to work) and we will see how things go from here. I'm just trying to keep my spirits high and not think about the stresses in my life right now. There is nothing I can do for Kelsey since she has pushed me away, it's time to focus on making myself better, stronger, and then maybe she will then let me return the favor of being there for her in her time of need.