Hi DragonflyK and welcome to PC. Here is a place where you can ask those questions and hear about the journeys others have taken. I was also diagnosed with depression (and ADD and anxiety) and was only diagnosed BP after prozac triggered a hypomanic phase and I had a GP who actually paid attention.

It's natural to want answers, and it helps to know the past so that you can figure out the future. I hope you find some answers here - I know you will find friends, love and acceptance.