Welcome to PC, Pinkestpink!

It is not easy and hear your frustration. I don't know if you have a provider: a therapist (T), counselor, or psychiatrist (pdoc), but this would be a good time to talk to them let them know what is going on. They can help or consider contacting one to help you during this time.

I too was in a job that did not help my depression and other symptoms. It became a vicious cycle but financially/insurance-wise I could not leave. I worked on trying to get better with providers where I was and then started to look for another job (while keeping the current one). I was much happier once I went to the other place and it also made the transistion easier b/c I was in a better mental position. But just quitting would not have worked for me. This may be the case for you too.

Work on helping yourself now and don't worry about the job. You is what is most important, ask for help and go from there. Things will fall into place. Hang in there in the meantime.