I am new here; I have always wanted to talk to someone about my feelings, as until now I have never really found anyone who I could trust as much. I am 16 years old, and I have rented a small room thing to complete my studies. I am sort of on my own since 6 months now. And 6 more months left! Since I have learnt how hard it is to live on your own, cook for yourself and so on, I now know the value of my parents; which I am very glad for!
Although I believe that I have become more respectful; my family still sees me as ignorant, rude and so on... No, I am not that kind of a person; it's just that I feel different from everyone else in my family, therefore I disagree with them most of the time, which ends up with huge arguments!

Right now my brother is here to visit me; I try to keep him entertained and happy, but he just keeps complaining how I disrespect my parents, and how unwanted I am- even though I know that my parents would never say that, it hurts for me to listen to all that!
So now that he is here, he is actually making me feel worse! He says, that I have got into the habit of staying on my own, therefore I don't appreciate anyone else! Why does he look at everything in such a negative manner? Or is it my fault? Just an hour ago, I was crying my eyes out, locked in the toilet, without my brother knowing; about how the small mistakes I may do today, will cause major negative effects on me and my family in the future- if I AM the bad person in the family, why? Where did I go wrong?

Another thing that really hurts me is that I am 16 years old, and I have still not started on my periods; this may be off-topic; but this also means that I can't even have kids (until yet), which again leaves me thinking, how will I live my life in the future, I have failed to live with my present family, now I don't want NO family to be able to live happily with...