Really sorry you don't feel well (or worse, not really know how you feel) but you are not alone...Your post really comforted me because along with another incident I had started having doubts even about my diagnosis on the grounds of excalty that feeling that seems to belong to neither pole! So thank you for that...But yes, as others have said, I suppose it is mild or controlled depression...Not sure what to do about it though...The only thing I try is to keep myself in touch with reality and what's true to me so as not to sink or lose myself in this 'presence of non-existence'! If that makes any sense...

Lots of hugs and love