Thanks for the suggestions and the support everyone. I did reread over what I wrote for step one today and it was an eyeopenning reminder of just how powerless I really am.

I talked a lot about how I really want to drink with at my AA meeting Thurs. night, my hospital group on Fri., and with my closest friend this morning, and I'm continuing to pray a lot.

UKFox - you asked about keeping busy. I am pretty busy. Job hunting takes up a lot of my time, I've been taking 3 courses, and I have two instruments to practice, plus I volunteer on my psych hospital's telephone support line 1 night a week, plus I'm an administrator on a large self-harm recovery site, that takes a lot of attention. Plus I go to 3 AA meetings a week and 4 treatment groups a week at my hospital, so I don't have much downtime, which is good, as downtime is extremely dangerous for me.

I have had some good news on the job front - I've got two interviews next week. One is a preliminary phone screening interview for an analyst job at a hospital, and the other is for a controller's job with a company that approached me. So i'm hoping, that if I don't screw up the interviews, I just might have a job by the end of December, in which case the argument against drinking will be that much stronger as I will not risk screwing up another job with drinking.