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Dec 04, 2010, 06:56 PM
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Member Since: Dec 2010
Location: Over the Rainbow
Posts: 62
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Quote:
Originally Posted by invisigirl
just this afternoon, for some reason I started remembering something from when I was about 5 or 6.. I was in my room and remembering what it looked like and the toys I had and all that... and then I wasn't there anymore. I was somewhere else, doing something else that never happened. why? why do I imagine such sick things? ew.
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Invisigirl,
I'm so so sorry that you're struggling with this. Sannah is right. Sibling sexual abuse is serious, and you owe it to yourself to take it seriously, even if your family won't.
I too have struggled a long time with fantasies that seem to suck me into horrible situations. I've also tried to fight them, but that only seemed to make them come back with a vengeance. I now feel they're cathartic, like nightmares. I believe our imagination is trying to help us heal, not torture us (though it seems like that sometimes). I've found that allowing the fantasies to play out, crying when necessary, getting angry when necessary, helps make them less severe and less frequent.
Please keep working with your therapist. If you don't want to touch upon the abuse now then wait until you're ready. Remember that, unlike your family, she's on your side. If for any reason you get messages that she's not then find one who is! I remember when I first told my former therapist that I'd gone no contact with my family. Although I knew that it was the right thing, I still felt guilty. She said, "What an empowering thing to do." I can't tell you what that did for me!
Stay strong!
Rainbow 
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