Quote:
Originally Posted by zooropa
I feel really out of sorts tonight.
I'm physically ill (kidney infection, etc) and exhausted, but I feel emotional too.
I guess I'm just laying here feeling really bad and trying to sort whether it's physical, or emotional, or both. Probably both.
And then I think about what T would say, which I'm guessing at obviously. My experience with her tells me that she would say it doesn't matter that much, in this moment, where it's coming from. What matters is just letting it be, and taking care of myself both physically and emotionally so I have the resources to deal with my life.
It's just been a lot going on. Again, both physically and emotionally. I feel like I can't catch my breath, can't get the down time I need to recharge. So scared this is the beginning of a downward spiral, when in reality it's just a day. Tomorrow will be a new one.
So, that conflict, again, between what I know in my head and what I feel in my heart.  |
(((((Zooropa)))))
I've kinda learned to go without my T because I've had no choice since I moved farther away and I don't trust my car for the trip. I miss the weekly connection, but what my T has said and did for me stays with me no matter what and I find that comforting. It is also comforting knowing that I will see T again in the near future. Sometimes it can be hard depending on what I am dealing with. Granted, I don't know the exact issues you deal with or if some of them are similar to mine or not, but I know how bad sickness can really start to wear on a person's emotional well being and in turn making you even more run down physically.
I know though too that if it ever becomes overwhelming for me, that I can always call my T. Do you have that sort of a connection with your T, that you can call him if it gets overwhelming? I've been in the spot where friends and family had completely abandoned me in my time of greatest need too. If you are in that spot, calling your T is the best option to prevent complete emotional breakdown.
Try not to analyze if it is physical causing the emotional or all just emotional weighing you down. It really doesn't matter that much as long as you are doing everything you can to take care of your physical ailments. Try resting, watching movies, rentals on Netflix, talking to friends and family (non-toxic friends and family) and just relaxing. I suspect being sick and going through what you have recently is what has triggered you. Call your T if it gets too bad or is heading that way.
