When my emotions feel out of control I sort of have this order of things I try to see what helps. The first thing I do is figure out if I am tired, hungry, dehydrated or something like that. I fix any of those with the appropriate response before I do anything else. I really can't get things in control if I don't eat or sleep properly.

The second thing I do is self-soothing. Walking, baths, hot tea, massage my own feet... anything that makes me feel calmer. Sometimes I will do some grooming- pluck my eyebrows or put on nice clothes, perfume, or makeup. Breathing techniques and mindfulness also help here.

If that doesn't help then I will try to find safer ways to vent my emotions. Holding on to ice cubes or going outside and throwing those ice cubes at the wall. It makes a very satisfying shattering sound and doesn't require any cleanup! Doing some writing in my journal or posting on here!

Then I move to being active and distracting myself mode. I clean the house or organize something. Any healthy distraction that you enjoy can fit here though- a sport, a video game, playing an instrument, or just listening to music (that isn't angry or sad) and dancing around the house. The activity helps produce endorphins and the distraction keeps my mind from dwelling on the negative thoughts.

If all else fails there is the 15 minute (or 5 or 10) technique. I set a timer and decide I am going to try to breath and not do anything harmful for the next 15 minutes no matter what. I just keep deciding that again and again until usually I get kind of bored and decide I would rather do something else. It is best to try as hard as you can not to think about self harm or obsess on you emotions during these few minutes. Take a meditation mind set towards those thoughts. If they cross your mind fine, but let them go instead of ruminating and elaborating on them.

Good Luck- It is very hard and takes a lot of work.