Hello idontknow and welcome.

I have some strong things to say concerning the situation you are in so I hope I don't offend you or anyone else.

First, I am above all, one of the first people that would tell a person to try and resolve all issues with their mate, but not this time.

I am sure she has some pretty tough issues she needs to work out and I'm just as sure she needs professional help. I sure hope she gets it for her sake.

But the advice I'm going to give you is simple .... GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!

You need to look after yourself and there is no winning here. You deserve happiness, honesty and love and much, much more - and you're not getting anything.

It's one thing for a mate to be sick, to be ill, but it's another for one to abuse another and cheat and lie and so on and on ... Lots of people take that sort of thing everyday, but not this old boy.

I went throgh a lot of stuff like that with my exwife so I know where you're at. We never spoke of divorce, no not once, in our marraige until that last day. I had simply woke up and said enough. I took a shower, dressed and waited for her to get up. When she did, I simply told her she needed to take a shower and to get dressed because we WERE going to town.

She asked what for, and I simply stated to see an attorney, and afterward she could go her way and I would go mine. If that makes me sound harsh - I'm sorry, but this old boy only takes so much.

Love is about bonding together, about sharing one's soul, about building something together. What you've spoken of is abuse anyway you look at it.

If it were me, I'd never call her anything - BUT GONE!

I hope you nothing but the best. Let us know how you're doing.

Sam

"You'll never know what you're capable of if you don't try."