I think that if we change how we react to those the behavior we don't want from those in our lives, then their behavior will probably change in some way. How it will change is up to them of course, but if what they do no longer works for them, then they will change it. Of course that is total theory & has nothing to do with how difficult it is to change & the walls of resistance we have built around ourselves & our relationships.

I am currently on Cymbalta, Celexa, Trazadone & Ativan. I have been on Zoloft, Effexor, Abilify, Lithium & about 5 others that I don't remember the names. This combination works the best, but that isn't saying much. The Cymbalta does help with the depression, but it is more for my fibromyalgia. Celexa is for depression & anxiety. Trazadone is for sleep. Ativan is taken only when needed to prevent anxiety from taking over, which is usually when I have to leave my house, although lately I have found myself needing it more & more even at home. This increased usage concerned me enough to discuss it with the psychiatrist who suggested I continue to be vigilant in monitoring my usage of Ativan, as I could build up a tolerance to it & then it would not work. The thought of having to deal with life without the assistance of an effective anti-anxiety drug is terrifying to me! So I am being much more conservative about reaching for that bottle.
I instead try much harder to make the relaxation & other techniques work first. You know the ones I mean? Like mindfull breathing or distracting oneself from the anxiety producing stimulus or self soothing? Perhaps as I practice these more frequently, Ativan will become less a part of my life.

I take other drugs too, but they are for physical things, not "psych" meds. I really hate that classification though, because I believe that my (probably everybody's) BPD is a result of a screwed up nervous system, probably a specifically a brain disorder. Just most of the medical community hasn't figured that out yet. Sigh.
I asked my psy.doc. to do an MRI of my brain to prove I had BPD, as a former therapist told me that there were visible differences in BPD brains, & he said he had no knowledge of it. It would be pointless to do because there is no widely accepted criteria for diagnosing BPD based on MRI results. Even of there were. the treatment would not change. Sigh.

So, I guess the fact that it would prove that there is something physically different about me & therefore validate what I have felt all my life, is too insignificant. That is not a good enough reason to do an MRI. UGH!

I hate people!

Actually, as people go, my psych doc is pretty good. It's not him, it's life that it the problem. The whole system. Society, expectations, needs, pain... all that stuff.