I hate Xmas too. 9 years ago, my father got very sick the day after Christmas...turned out it was a brain tumor (glioblastoma, the same thing Ted Kennedy died from). By the following August, he was dead. Christmas brings up very real and palpable feelings of grief for me, because I think it is, at heart, a "child's" holiday. All of us, grieving or not, think of Christmas and we immediately get transported back to that time when we were children, waking up our parents on that morning, opening presents, etc. And it's just really, really hard to have those memories knowing one of my parents is not here anymore.

I do not decorate at all for Xmas (I live alone) and do not really listen to any Xmas music. However, I love giving other people gifts and sending cards. But that's where it ends. They can do their thing, and I'll do mine.