Hi Samantha!

Oh my goodness!!!!!! I can't believe I found this post...it couldn't have been BETTER TIMING. Well, I've been married to a man for 5+ years and have ZERO passion for him as well. He is the perfect man for me, OTHER than passion of course. He massages my feet and legs WHENEVER I ask. He gives me total control of all his money. He lets me have whatever I want. He plays we the kids. We have two boys, 3 (ours together) and 12. He's never hit me or the boys. He is in the military, so we are VERY CONTENT. We have a nice house, new furniture, and a new car with three tv's in it. We even have a dog and cat who are so precious. We like to do the same things. We have the same spiritual beliefs. He'll say he's sorry on a regular basis. He does get MAD at times, having TOO much pride! HOWEVER, he'll be humbled within minutes and is quick to apologize. He is the BEST lover as well.

HOWEVER, I am repulsed at the thought of him even touching me in a romantic way. I haven't kissed him in a YEAR. And, we only have sex 3 times a year! He is the one who is hot for me. He is the one who wants to cuddle and have sex all the time. He's pressured me for sex so many times that it became a chore. It became an OBLIGATION. And, I was raped when I was a virgin in my teenage years..so, this could also play a role. So, we basically live like roommates. I have my own bedroom and he has his. Mainly, however, the reason for sleeping in seperate rooms is because his snoring could ROCK THE HOUSE. LOL. Also, I enjoy having SOME independance since marriage can really make you feel SUFFOCATED.

Also, he doesn't drink, do drugs, or smoke. He'd prefer hanging out with me and the boys than hanging out with some friends at a strip club. And, he doesn't make me work! He likes me staying home..WHICH I LOVE! I'm a CNA, however, I LOVE taking care of the house and children. I get to watch my 3 year old grow up! I've been by his side watching him learn how to talk and grow. It's adorable watching him at this age! I've been home with him since he was born. I did go to work at the hospital for a bit, but only part time.

Anyway..I've LONGED for PASSION. I'm not attracted to my hubby's mouth because his teeth are so yellow and he has an unattractive mouth all together. So, I WON'T KISS it. And, I hate sex..even though he's good at it. I've often thought about leaving him for a guy I have lust/passion with, but then I start thinking about reality. I start thinking about everything I could lose. And, I could end up with some selfish arrogant guy who ends up CHEATING ON ME. My husband is loyal to the core and madly in love with me..AND ME ONLY. I don't ever have to worry about him cheating on me. He goes to work and comes straight home. He only works right around the corner.

I have often wondered what kind of guy I'd end up with if I left my husband who has given me a content and happy life...excluding the physical arena. Am I willing to take the chance of losing everything, NO! I will remind myself of how good I have it everytime I get a desire for passion. And, as you can see, I FOUND YOUR POSTING! What are the chances of that happening! Now that you have strayed away to get your 'passion,' you realize it's not all you thought it would be. Here's a saying: 'Temptation can look sweet and delicious at first, but it will eventually turn SOUR.' We want what looks good to the eye..we CRAVE it! However, it's never what we thought it would be. Sex and passion do NOT make a relationship work because it's only the dessert. We need the MAIN COURSE..the entree! If we live on dessert for too long, without any healthy foods, we'll get sick! With our husbands, we are getting the main course..the healthy meals. However, we start craving the SWEETS! This is NORMAL. I'm not saying some people don't have BOTH, however, this is HARD TO FIND.

I hope I've helped you! Please respond SOON. I battle this passion which burns inside me just like you do, so you're NOT alone! I get so sick with depression at times because my craving overwhelms me. However, for the most part, most of the time, I'm soooo happy and CONTENT. I only crave the passion once in a while. Take care!


Steph