hello,
I just want to say that I was/am the person who dwells still on stuff that most of the people consider sort of painful part of their life. Of course, it is not worthed to do it, and I still do it to some degree. Let's say my examples of obsessive behavior is to check all possible source of information for this particular guy. Before, I used to accept the things on a personal level where I felt hurt and wanted to express this kind of unfairness of the life i made myself. Then, I slowly realized, that time was passing by with every relationship I had, and I dwelled on it until the point I saw no hope in saving memories that were just part of my past. I know people live their life differently, but I tried to erase past memories, some of them are done for good, some of them are still there. I think it should be normal to have your own life and be glad of it and am completely fine. I just wanted to say that I am still struggling with one particular sort of weakness and this is really to break the habit of the life i learned to live. Before I was indeed, a bit confused, or hurted,or feeling emotional in a good or bad way. Now ,because of obsessive thoughts and not willing to stop thinking about past I realize that time is the only precious thing you can use and at this particular moment only. Then, my words versus my actions come into place, and sometimes I do all the stuff I believe and want to do, and at the end I might still find myself feeling with lower self-confidence. I read self-help books , but the only last thing for now that I have to stop is to just reinvent my actions for life. I live my life fully still, but with one exception i do have to change more.
If you are keep checking on the person of interest, believe it or not youjust might learn more, but then what, for some people it might resolve where they can be together,for some people it is not happening, and you lose time you could use for yourself, same as the other person did. There are so many things I want to share, and I hope this is the start. I was pretty vague but I will learn to be a more specific for the topic i want to write,too.
Please, be glad of your life, I live mine fine and I do have to change, because a couple of the qualities i have now are of no help..