Specifically with regard to crying... in the partial program I just "graduated" from, there was one person who would cry uncontrollably at the mention of one particular topic. Something that comes up rather regularly in fact, and it seemed it only took one "key" word from any of the group members, in any context (a happy story or a sad one) that would trigger that person. In the beginning she would get up and leave on her own because she couldn't control her emotions or behavior. (She was never kicked out).

By the end of the 4 week program, she was able to sit calmly when the topic came up and even join in the conversation. She came not only to understand but to feel that she was allowed to have those emotions, to feel them, to grieve in her own way and at her own speed. Through this period, if whenever this came up, the facilitator of that particular group would give her time to speak, but still allow time for the original speaker to complete their thought. If she didn't speak, the facilitator would comment on how much improvement she had... that she was able to cry but not leave the room... was able to cry but for a shorter time and still able to interact with the group, etc. (Understand, the goal was not to keep her from crying but rather to help her get to a point where she wouldn't become non-functional at the mention of this word). And the facilitator would elicit comments from the rest of the group as to their observations on the changes they have seen. This was really a common event in the sessions, asking the group what changes they could see in other as the groups progressed... isn't that part of what group therapy is about? It helps the person see that they have made tangible progress AND gives the other group members the sense of hope that the group can make a change for the better.

It is a tricky balancing act so as not to allow the focus to always be put on one person, but all the facilitators there seemed very well trained to do so... by not allowing people to interupt but also remembering to come back to the interuptor for their thoughts when the first person finished... to always get the group involved with their thoughts, opinions and suggestions, etc.