Such a good question-I wonder myself...

"they have to want to change."...in order to change is unfair. I feel that puts pressure on a person who has a difficult time living through their mental illness...it takes one person to live through what another person lives through, to really understand what changes should be made and what the person goes through...instead of being so preoccupied with HOW they should change.

Do you think the problem with relapse is that people have trouble accepting the person for who they are and what they have? Maybe instead of resisting what a person has, maybe it is better to just love and accept the person for who they are, EVEN during the bad times...as well. It takes a lot of strength to love yourself through the bad times.

Easier said then done though, I know. Most of the problems in all relationships arises when another person can't fully accept another and they want them to change, somehow...without admitting it. But you don't want people you love to hurt themselves either.

It takes a time to get really low to reclaim yourself. Sometimes people just need to do that over and over before change can happen. And that should be okay in this world. It should be okay to fall and ask for help-even if it means, again. I think people can change all the time. Sometimes in ways that are not so evident to others. It just takes time.

I don't know-but good question. I am curious to read other food for thought to your post!