yes, bc, that bothered me for the same reasons. She asked me what traumas I wanted to talk about. I sat there thinking "my whole life??"

I don't know. Lots of weird feelings after today's session. I know most of it was me, this time. I'm not doing a good job of self care, and it shows.

I left T a message a while ago. I told her what I remembered her saying and asked her if she remembers it the same way. Then I told her that, if that is what she said, it bothers me and I can't quit thinking about it. I said I know she's busy but I hope she'll call me back when she has time.

It's not an emergency, by any means, but still. I didn't get what I needed from T today and I'm more than a little resentful towards her for various reasons. So part of me doesn't care very much if she's stressed out or if she's sick of talking to me. Part of me wants to keep going back to her again and again until she says something that helps me feel better. And part of me wants to make her angry, wants to bother her, wants to inconvenience her. I wonder what that part is, and why it wants that?

I think tomorrow will be better. It kind of has to, doesn't it?