It's now been over 10 years since I've started cutting and you'd think I'd have it mastered as to what would work for me to not cut. But I don't. I have it mastered down to an art how to cut and how far I can go, but I haven't yet figured out how to help myself when I want to cut.

My urges go in 2-week cycles, for some reason. It's feels like I'm refusing my body from oxygen or something...it's that necessary for me to cut. I become almost panicky when I do not cut. Sometimes I just wish I knew a way that I could stop cutting...at least for a time...and wish I didn't struggle with it so much.