Thanks Elana.
The thing is I don't really know what triggered the dissociation that time. Usually I can tell. All of the sudden I just felt something. And I needed to escape. I don't know what it was all about. I'm going to journal some today so maybe that will help me figure out what is going on. Something that made me really mad was one specific thing she said. I take my stuffed animal with me to T to help me feel safe. And she was like: "Your stuffed animal will help you come back." I can see why she thought that would help and where she was coming from by saying that. But at the same time it felt like she was using him against me. Using my stuffed animal who has been through hell with me against me. Just like my mom would. (just realized that part.) Got to go for now. be back later.