Welcome to pc Max. Maybe you can find your way here? I keep wondering how so many of us can be lost and not find each other IRL. I guess it's good you have a list, but maybe you need to break it down into even smaller steps? Just one thing, that you become consistent with... something that seems easy? And run with that.. the good feelings for one thing you DO... maybe you can make a list of those things you do on a regular basis? Do you get up at the same time each day, or watch a certain tv show, brush your teeth each day, get your mail? I hope you have help IRL for the depression... that alone can kill us. TC