I know how you feel...if that is any help, but hang in there!!! That's all we BP's can do. Even if it's making tea, just do what you can do and let the rest of things take care of themselves.
I feel guilty plenty of times, that I had a kid, not believing that bipolar was genetic, but rather environmental and I feel bad that my husband is "stuck" with me, a wife who is on disability.
He is nice to me, and that makes me feel even more guilty, like I should be treated badly because of my problems and that he could have picked someone who is together, working and okay.
I hope that things work out for you!!!!
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