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Yack, this is awful. Try to hang in there...I am worried for you. I hope that you will try to get help soon. I am here for you and you can count on me to be there for you when you need someone to talk to.
Take care. Stay safe. We're all here for you.
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"When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it." -Bernard Bailey
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